Filmed in low quality, cars pass as people walk down a street. A businessman, with briefcase in hand, walks by some construction with a sign that says “detour ahead.” Jewel sits in a bench, people-watching.

 An older, bearded guy with liquor bottle in hand, sleeps on a bench.

Jewel walks down the street and buys a soda from a vendor. She runs her along the bench. When she is ready to take a sip, she gets up. The film switches to commercial, high quality as she drinks the soda. Her blouse blows open, revealing a black bikini with the tagline by her stomach reading “Jewel Refreshes.”

She steps away and the film returns back to normal and a man sits down on the bench to read his newspaper. She then walks by the construction area. Switching to commercial quality again, the neon sign reads “Jewel. It continues to read dollar signs, Bling Bling and Big Pimpin’ as she dances in front a vehicle. She rubs her finger and thumb together to indicate money.

Back to low quality, Jewel waits to cross the street. Three men, on their break, put their hands in their jeans as an ad reads “Jewel – Make Her Your Own.”

She pushes her shoulders back together as she walks. Further down the block, two guys are playing basketball. In the advertisement, one man goes in for the dunk as the ad says “Jewel Does It.”

 On the street, a man takes a picture. On the crossing sign, the person figure changes to a lime green silhouette of Jewel. On television, the street has become a runway as photographers take her picture. Her picture is then shown on magazines.

 A bus turns left. Jewel sees a little puppy and asks if she can pet it. She holds the dog in her arms. Across from her, people are protesting. She hands the dog back to the person.

Switching to television, a man cartwheels as her video is shown a version of TRL. The ticker reads across the screen – “Jewel’s music sounds much better now that she’s dancing.” She rubs her chest as she and her dancers perform a choreographed routine.

Back in low quality, a man bends down near Jewel as she watches people set up a background of palm trees. It turns out someone is shining her shoes. Back in the commercial, the palm tree is set against the man sitting on the bench with the liquor bottle. It reads “Jewel Extra. Change Your Attitude.”

The set gets taken away and the bearded, older man awakes, wondering what all the commotion was about. Meanwhile, smoke rises from the construction site.

On television, the flames burn a romantic, fiery orange as she and her dancers perform another choreographed routine. A light purple explosion occurs.

The fire trucks arrive. On television, the fire men spray her white t-shirt with the water. Her black bra shows through as she touches her breasts and stomach. The shirtless, muscled fire men lick their lips.

 Jewel smiles and walks down the next street.

 

Rating: 1/5

The satirical commercials which point and jeer at pop culture condescend to the audience Jewel now desires. The derision aimed at the music videos themselves of the early 2000s is outright contempt. While it is on point with the exaggerated explosions and themed outfits, there’s some resentment that she was left behind and had to do her singer/songwriter shtick as the youngsters had fun.

There are some funny moments: the ticker reading “Jewel’s music sounds much better now that she’s dancing” and “Big Pimpin’.” The humor does exist, when she is making fun of herself. Unfortunately, it’s limited. Otherwise, it does become crass. When she is sitting on the bench, she hints at oral sex in public. She’s trying to shock by not shocking while shocking.

It’s an insecure transition. She’s hanging onto her singer/songwriter credibility by staying in the low quality film aspect. It’s as though she’s embarrassed and ashamed to be reduced to doing dance songs in order to remain on the radio.

Director: Marc Klasfeld Year: 2003