A hot pink screen, advertising a movie trailer, reads that it’s been approved for all audiences and rated as PH – Paris Hilton.
A teenage boy gurgles as his head is dunked into the toilet bowl. As he coughs and gasps for air, a popular jock pulls at hair, saying it’s something he must like. The teenage boy answers “if I say yes, would that mean you would stop doing it?” His girlfriend (Elisha Cuthbert) tells her boyfriend to “do it again.”
At home, he sits on his bed, a Maxim magazine in his hand with his chihuahua next to him. He stares at his Paris Hilton posters. He sits by his mirror and imagines her whispering in his ear.
The screen reads, “Sometimes a dreamer.”
In class, he is handed back his paper. He groans as the screen says “Is a loser.” He received a D on his paper. He thinks he would pass the class if his teacher were Paris Hilton instead.
He gets shoved into the lockers. The screen reads “Sometimes reality.” as he walks into the cafeteria, carrying his hot lunch. It continues with “is not what it seems.” He blinks his eyes a few times as he watches Hilton talk with some girls.
Hilton walks across the school’s campus.
He gets caught up in his staring and a popular guy knocks his lunch over his chest, causing the food to spill.
In the locker room, Hilton dances by the rows of football helmets.
While he’s walking home from school, he sees the house next to him has been sold.
Hilton’s dog jumps out of her car while his dog runs to meet the new animal.
His mouth agape, he drops his backpack and watches Hilton walk out of her car. She says “hello” to him and he grins.
From his bedroom, he watches her undress. She catches him as she reaches around her back to take her bra off. She waves to him.
The screen reads “Sometimes a loser.”
He stands outside his luxury car and meets Hilton as she walks down the driveway in ehr boyfriend’s arm. He asks “Can I ask you something?”
The screen reads “Wins” when he and Hilton walk arm-in-arm into the cafeteria. Their classmates turn around, stunned. A guy knocks over the jock’s food.
In her bedroom, she dances around in her purple bra and jeans.
As Hilton whispers in his ear in his bedroom again, the screen reads “Dare to dream.”
The remade version of 2004’s “Girl Next Door” (which starred Elisha Cuthbert) relies on the fantasy and wish fulfillment of the 80s John Hughes films, like Weird Science but modernizing it to reflect the 00s celebrity-obsessed culture. It may be inspired by the movie, however, it is also able to stand on its own
Paris Hilton is the teenage boy’s celebrity crush. Thoughts of her help him get through being bullied at school and escape the loneliness. When she shows up one day, he develops confidence and they form a friendship. Her celebrity helps him out at school and for once, he is seen as someone of value to his classmates.
There is no hint of the original’s focus on a woman’s sexuality, including slut-shaming and misogyny. Any vulgarity was removed. The one scene that is replicated from the original trailer is the teenage boy spying on her undressing. However, Hilton wanted him to watch her, changing the context of the scene. The video predates Instagram and Snapchat in which Hilton’s behavior is exhibited and like the teenage boy, people strive for viral moments.
Director: Scott Speer Year: 2006
This post contains affiliate links, which means I will receive a small commission from items purchased through them