Video Review: Kelly Clarkson "I Do Not Hook Up"

At a dinner party in the backyard, a man says “you’re kidding me!” to his father and ruffles his nephew’s hair. Wearing a yellow suit and holding his glass of champagne, another man exclaims “that’s why the rich don’t pay taxes!” Kelly Clarkson smirks as she watches her family laugh at the joke.

Her grandfather calls out for more champagne. She watches as the server pops open the bottle. A chihuahua licks the champagne in a glass next to door. The server walks by to check on everyone. Once he reaches her, he puts his hand in hers.

She imagines them making out on the table, much to her family’s horror.

Clarkson performs at a dive bar.

She bites on her nail, thinking of feeding him a strawberry. However, it’s her cousin asking her if she wants some strawberries.

At the bar, she laughs with two of her girlfriends. She spots a young man playing pool and they hold their gazes for about thirty seconds. Her friends toast to one another.

She imagines racing to the bar with her friends and dancing on top of the counter. Her arms flap as she tries to regain her balance. However, she falls behind the bar. The music stops and everyone waits to see if she’s okay. She stands up, raising her arm in the air, exclaiming “yeah!” Everyone cheers.

She returns to dancing on top of the bar while the young man smiles. He walks over to the bar and leans back, allowing the female bartenders to pour liquor down his throat. She pulls on his shirt, stopping him before he can go back to his table. She runs her hand down his cheek and winks.

In reality, though, she continues to gaze at him from her table.

Rating: 3.5/5

As a blue blood, Kelly Clarkson was taught to think of her inheritance in her choice of a partner. It was veiled threat to choose someone of equal stature. Her parents had introduced her to politician’s sons and in a fit of desperation, a few pop stars. However, she sees her a wealth as a trap. She longs for the someone like the server who may not have much but has a kind heart.

He often caters for their parties and her family knows him by name. She wishes her life were simpler and she could go out with him. However, she can only fantasize.

A regular person, she hangs out with her two best friends on a Saturday night. They drink shots and stay at their table all night, laughing and catching up. Her friends catch her looking at a guy and encourage her to talk to him. However, she thinks he wouldn’t like her. He looks her way sometimes but she notices there are several women with him. She doesn’t have a chance.

She envisions getting his attention by dancing on the bar, impressing him with her spontaneity. He would tell her that she was the most thing about the evening. She would kiss on the lips and ask him to go out with her.

But she doesn’t have the confidence or the courage to go after him. Her friends keep telling her to put herself out there. However, she doesn’t want to get hurt. If it means she’s single forever, so be it. Marriage wasn’t meant for her. She’ll be happy with her dogs.

Director: Bryan Barber Year: 2009


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