Video Review: Lizzo & Cardi B “Rumors”

Two ancient golden Greek statutes hold a cup. Within the cup, a painted Lizzo, in a goddess outfit, sits with candles on her arms. The cup turns and Lizzo waves her arms. She walks by an animated mural of people talking. An animated Lizzo shakes her butt within another cup as she continues to walk. An animated champagne bottle pops and confetti falls over Lizzo on the ground.

Lizzo joins several twentysomething women on a platform. They dance on columns. Cardi B reads a scroll as she sits on a throne on clouds.. Lightning strikes behind her. The twentysomething women dance by her. Lizzo sits by a statute of a butt. She touches her breasts as she walks down a winding staircase. Cardi B joins Lizzo and the twentysomething women as they dance on a raised platform. Lizzo and Cardi touch fingers. The pose is painted onto a vase.

Rating: 3/5

Lizzo smacks Aphrodite and tells she’s a coward. Aphrodite seethes and touches her face. Lizzo shakes her head as Aphrodite calls upon Zeus. Zeus was Aphrodite’s go-to whenever she couldn’t get her way. Usually, Aphrodite could get people to do whatever she wanted. Zeus wanted to sleep with her and thereby, granted Aphrodite her every desire.

Cardi B deflects Zeus’ killing ray to Lizzo. Zeus says she’s nothing but trouble. Cardi B tells him she has the power he thinks he has. Zeus vows to get his revenge. Cardi B scoffs and mocks his flaring nostrils. Zeus roars, and Cardi B taps her foot, rolling her eyes.

Lizzo saunters to her throne. She brushes it off and sits on it. Aphrodite bows to her and says she was in the wrong. Lizzo stares at her as she rambles she was having an awful day. Zeus had ditched her for another younger goddess and she wishes she had her confidence. Lizzo tells her “we’re good” and motions for Aphrodite to leave.

Director: Tanu Muino Year: 2021

Pam Avoledo Administrator
Pam Avoledo spends her time binge-watching classic teen dramas and stands firm in her pro-Leyton stance. She also received her journalism degree in 2006 from Oakland University. Her work has been published in the White Wall Review, Sledgehammer Lit ,Greatest City Collective, 45 Magazine ,Fevers of the Mind, Daily Drunk Mag\'s Kirstofia anthology. and forthcoming in Scrawl Place